Friday, August 10, 2007

Our Patients

We have some amazing patients here on the ward and when you hear their stories, you think that they just can't be true. Stories I couldn't dream up if I tried. Women who were in obstructed labor for days on end, alone, out in the bush (that means basically in the forest or the woods) while surrounded by rebels as young as 9 years old who are trying to kill them. That is the same story for many, many of the ladies I've cared for. It sounds like the plot of a horrific movie.

Our ships surgeons have done amazing work and our latest VVF surgeon, Dr. Brian, is no exception. He took on some fistula repairs over the last two weeks that he didn't know if he could fix. Some he could and some he couldn't. Many fistulas are easy for our surgeons to fix and many are beyond repair. I've been caring for one lady named Fatamata who is 30 years old. She was in obstructed labor for 8 days. With any lengthy, obstructed labor, the baby dies after the first two or so days but even after the baby dies, it can still take many more days to give birth. Fatamata came to the ship last time it was in Liberia and the doctors told her they couldn't fix her. She tried to kill herself right there on the dock in front of the ship. She came back again this year and Dr. Brian said he would try but he wasn't able to fix all the damage. She will live the remainder of her life leaking urine and living with all that means (skin breakdown, smelling horrible, an outcast). Please pray for her as we all have been doing. She has received much counseling from our chaplains and counselors but we just have to put her in God's hands and know he loves her more than we ever could.

In contrast to Fatamata, I've been caring for a spunky, older woman named Mary. Once I told her that was my mom's name, she has called me 'her daughter.' She was fixed by Dr. Brian and we had her dress ceremony today. For an hour, we sang worship songs to God, she gave her testimony, she hugged all of us and thanked us and I got to present her with her new Bible, a bar of soap and a mirror all representing new life. Every dress ceremony is unbelievably emotional.

During the ceremony, I sat on one of the beds and I just kept looking between Fatamata (who was watching the ceremony) and Mary - just back and forth. And I just couldn't grasp the 'why' of this whole situation. I was so happy for Mary and then would just feel so sad for Fatamata. This happens in every dress ceremony - we celebrate for those who are physically healed but there are always one or two who can't be healed at the same time. Just so you know, all women are invited to participate in the dress ceremony, not just the ones who are physically healed. I don't know if Fatamata will.

Anyways, I don't have any answers and I'm not going into all the theological reasons on why God allows bad things to happen. I know all those answers but on days like this, it isn't enough. So I just continue to pray and know that I will never be the same.

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