My new job

September 3rd, I will be starting a new position as a palliative care (hospice) nurse. I met today with Jean Brown, currently our one and only hospice nurse, to get more details about the job. I'm in for a challenging few months.

There are two parts to the job. First, is caring for patients who are terminally ill. I will be traveling to the patients' homes with Jean to provide nursing care along with spiritual and emotional care. Most of her patients are kids with cancer - I wasn't prepared for the kids part...I'm not sure how I will handle this. Lots of prayers, please. Liberia has no healthcare system so cancer is a terminal condition always, even the kinds that are curable or treatable in the U.S.

The second part is developing a sustainable hospice program that will remain in place after Mercy Ships leaves Liberia. Working through churches, we want to create a program where terminal patients can seek care. While we have many of these programs developed in the U.S., the West African culture is far different from ours and we don't know what will work. For example, West Africans do not talk about death - they live only for today. So if the topic is taboo, creating a program for such a topic will be difficult at best.

It feels good to be way out of your league, as I am. It's much easier to rely on God and His direction when you don't have a clue what you are doing. I'm glad to be back in such a position. West African medicine frequently involves the occult as many people seek treatment from witch doctors, especially people who live in rural villages.

So for any of my counseling, chaplain and nursing friends, I would be interested in hearing about any resources that may help me (books, websites, magazines, support groups, etc.). You can email me at mzeller27@yahoo.com.

Jean will be leaving Mercy Ships in December after 10 years. I don't know what my long-term plans are yet but this may evolve in to something permanent. We'll see what God has planned!

Peace,
Michele

More about George

My 9 year old friend George is still here, delayed by mechanical problems with the Red Cross airplane that was supposed to take him home last Friday. See the photos in the previous post of George. He has become quite popular onboard the ship and he loves the attention. Last night, he came and ate dinner with me in the dining room (rather than eating the African food we serve on the hospital ward).

It was his first experience eating at a table, he said. He doesn't have a table in his house. Dinner was ribs, french fries and peas. He liked the ribs but absolutely loved the french fries (hated the peas). I guess fries are universally loved by all children. As we walked through the dining room, many people stopped us to say hi because everyone knows George.

After dinner, I took him to the internet cafe. He hadn't seen a computer before and didn't know what it was. I showed him how to play a computer pinball game. He quickly caught on to how to use the mouse and the keyboard. He played for an hour and a half and I had to peel him from the keyboard! When he got the high score, he typed his father's name as the winner. His father was killed by the rebels when he was very young.

I took him to the Academy and the library onboard. He was amazed. He goes to school but his school is outside (no building) and they have no books. Our school has thousands of books and about 12 computers, taking up many large rooms on the ship.

He saw the laundry room where we have 10 washers and 10 dryers. He wanted to know how they worked. He washes his clothes on a washboard.

I took him to the snack shop where I bought him some M&Ms which, of course, he loved. I asked him where his family got their food. He didn't know where it came from but he said there wasn't a market close by. Makes me wonder how far his mother has to walk to buy food.

I wonder how these simple exposures might change him. He has been exposed to many new things and ideas over the last week and a half and I wonder if it will make him less satisfied with the simple life he has now. I hope not - I don't think we should impose our Western lifestyles on African culture. But I hope his viewpoint is expanded so that he knows he doesn't have to settle for an impoverished, unemployed life. Maybe he'll be one to make the difference in his country.

Saturday, I went back to God's Childrens' home, an orphanage I previously wrote about. We sang and played with the 50 or so kids. They are energetic, happy kids who are loved by the people who care for them. This isn't so in all the orphanages. The Liberian government had to put laws in place that prevent NGOs (non-governmental organizations - Mercy Ships is one) from supporting orphanages that do not meet the laws as there are apparently hundreds of orphanages that are exploiting children rather than caring for them.

At the orphanage, I met Joshua. He's 14 and he says he's named after Joshua from the Old Testament. He brought out this huge children's Bible and he told me the story behind every single picture in the Bible. He knew all the famous Bible stories (Adam and Eve, Noah's Ark) but he also knew many, many other stories that aren't usually a point of teaching to children. Some I will have to go back and reread to remember. He said he is going to be a pastor - I believe him.

After he told me all the Bible stories, he and two other boys platted (braided) my hair. I didn't know boys could do that but they all knew how. Almost all African women where their hair platted - mine didn't exactly look like theirs. Sorry, I didn't take a picture - it wasn't my best look!

Peace,
Michele

More about patients

It looks like I'm going to have a change in my job duties sometime in September. They were looking for another nurse to work in palliative (hospice) care and I volunteered. It was great how this came about (God, of course:). I had been praying last weekend about how I could get more involved in the community because we kind of live in this westernized bubble of a ship and the Liberians come to us rather than us out with them.

So Tuesday, I listened to a presentation about all of the community projects Mercy Ships is involved in and one was about palliative care. I talked to some friends about how I had been thinking about doing hospice nursing when I got home and said I'd really like to get involved in this ministry. So about three hours later, the nursing staff got an email from our supervisor saying there was a position in palliative care and did anyone want it. So I volunteered.

I don't have any details yet but I know the current palliative care nurse goes out to her patients' homes 3 days a week to care for them. It just occurred to me that I may have to drive here - that is a horrible thought. Hopefully, I'll have more details in the coming week. I am really, really excited about this (except about the driving).

I've had a lot of fun with my patients lately - really getting to know them rather than only caring for them. I have a few photos to share.

This is Jo (my roommate from Wales), me and George. George is a 9 year old who has been with us for a week. He was badly mutilated by rebels when he was two (they killed his dad) and his mom came hoping we could help him. We couldn't help him physically but he has been a huge joy for all the nurses. He never, ever stops smiling. He has been well-loved by all of us, helping us with our nursing duties, playing with us. George and I like to play soccer on the ward (with a balloon). He loves soccer. He has had lots of moms over the last week!


Here's another one of George. Even though we couldn't help him, he and his mom spent a week on the ward waiting on a way to get back home. The Red Cross picked them up today (Friday) to take them home.



This is Peter. Peter is 33 years old with three kids - he was born blind. We removed the cataract in his right eye and he will be fitted with a prosthetic eye in the left side. He left before I found out if his eyesite was restored. We had a long walk up and the down the hallway so I got to learn more about Peter. He liked to say 'Praise God' after every sentence.


Every afternoon, we take some of the patients up to Deck 7 so that they can get outside. The hospital is located on Deck 3 and has no windows so this is their opportunity to get some fresh air. Usually one of the translators leads us in singing for an hour which absolutely helps in the healing process (spiritually, emotionally and physically).

This is 6 month-old Junior. He came with his mom who had surgery. He has been with us about three weeks and the nurses like to 'fight' over who gets him. He is about the size of a two-month old due to malnourishment so we have him on a feeding program. His mom was in obstructed labor with him for four days and his brain was damaged - he can't hold his head up and his eyes don't track. Junior and his mom, Amelia, left today. She was physically healed - I don't know what the future will be like for him.

Here is Jo with Kou (left) and Mary. Kou has been here about 6 weeks due to a burn contracture wound that won't heal. She has a 10-month old baby waiting for her at home named Maurice. He has been able to come and stay with his mom for a few days but he doesn't like the nurses much! Mary left a couple days ago physically healed. She has been such a mentor and mother-figure to the ladies on the ward. She has tremendous faith. She's the one who called me 'her daughter.'

That's all the photos for now. As I sit here in the internet cafe looking out the portside window, I'm laughing as I watch my nursing supervisor, Judith, learn how to change the tire on one of our Land Rovers. They require that anyone who drives a car here must know how to change a tire so she is learning. I wish I had my camera! That will be me soon if I have to drive here.

Peace,

Michele

Story of Benedict

I'm reprinting a story of one our young patients that was posted on our intranet. We have a PR department and the story and photos are by staff members in that department.

16 July, 2007 — Liberia Field Service
Story: Mike Osborne
Photos: Debra Bell
© 2007 Mercy Ships Int’l.

16 July – Benedict Menkoah is one tough little boy. But if you think Benedict is tough, wait till you meet his big sister! Determination runs in the family.

Benedict suffered a birth defect that doctors refer to as bi-lateral club feet. In the womb, the boy’s feet turned so far inward the toes were left facing each other. His feet also rolled forward, leaving the soles facing upward.

Now nine, Benedict has learned to walk on the curled-under tops of his feet. It’s hard to watch him shuffle along. It looks so painful. But it’s clear from the calluses on his feet – rock hard knots of scarred and discolored flesh where the heel should land – that the handicap hasn’t managed to slow Benedict down too much.

His sister Beatrice, 26, says Benedict refuses to surrender to his handicap. She notes his love of soccer by way of example. He continues to play the game even though he rarely gets anywhere near the ball; he runs and falls, gets up again, runs and falls, gets up again.

When he’s not playing soccer, he’s climbing trees. Perhaps it’s more peaceful up there…high above all the people who laugh and call him hook-foot.

Benedict gets angry when people say things like that. Sometimes he even gets in fights over it. Beatrice gets a little angry too. When asked to describe what Benedict has endured, her eyes flash fire; she’s suddenly talking much louder and very fast. She’s especially hurt by the way her family has treated Benedict.

Their father has two wives and a total of sixteen children. Benedict is the youngest. When the extent of his birth defect became clear, Benedict’s father lost all interest in him and much of the family followed suit.

Beatrice eventually became so concerned about this neglect, that she brought Benedict to stay with her. They now live about a 90-minute drive from Liberia’s capital city, Monrovia, in a small community with the unlikely name of Taste-No-Smell.

In a country where eight people in ten are out of work, Beatrice managed to find a job. She teaches at a school operated by the YMCA of Liberia. She continues trying to better herself, taking computer classes in the evening.

Still, her meager salary would never have stretched far enough to provide corrective surgery for Benedict’s feet, so they were both excited when the Mercy Ship arrived in Liberia. The pair attended an orthopedic screening and Benedict was accepted to receive a free operation on the floating hospital.

As the surgery date rolled around, Beatrice realized she didn’t even have enough money for bus fare into the capital. She asked her eldest brother for the fare but he refused. He told her to forget about the surgery and leave Benedict as he was.

But Beatrice was determined and defied her elder brother, vowing she would get Benedict to the Mercy Ships for surgery even if she had to carry him there. Her defiance may eventually prove costly. The eldest brother becomes family patriarch when their father dies.

Beatrice finally talked an older sister into providing bus fare, and Benedict was one of the first patients to receive orthopedic surgery onboard the Africa Mercy. An operation to correct his left foot was completed without complication and Benedict spent a few days on the recovery ward.

Beatrice said of the free surgery Benedict received, “I couldn’t do it myself. I didn’t have the means. It was too big. So I say thank you. God bless you.”

Benedict is going to need every ounce of his determination to get through the next year. He’s working with Mercy Ships physical therapists now to learn how to walk on his newly corrected left foot; a slow and painful process.

Early next year he’ll have to travel to the neighboring nation of Sierra Leone, the ship’s next port of call. There he’ll have the right foot straightened and the process of learning to walk will begin all over again.

But there’s little doubt Benedict will succeed. After all, he’s just as tough as his big sister. Determination runs in the family.

Our Patients

We have some amazing patients here on the ward and when you hear their stories, you think that they just can't be true. Stories I couldn't dream up if I tried. Women who were in obstructed labor for days on end, alone, out in the bush (that means basically in the forest or the woods) while surrounded by rebels as young as 9 years old who are trying to kill them. That is the same story for many, many of the ladies I've cared for. It sounds like the plot of a horrific movie.

Our ships surgeons have done amazing work and our latest VVF surgeon, Dr. Brian, is no exception. He took on some fistula repairs over the last two weeks that he didn't know if he could fix. Some he could and some he couldn't. Many fistulas are easy for our surgeons to fix and many are beyond repair. I've been caring for one lady named Fatamata who is 30 years old. She was in obstructed labor for 8 days. With any lengthy, obstructed labor, the baby dies after the first two or so days but even after the baby dies, it can still take many more days to give birth. Fatamata came to the ship last time it was in Liberia and the doctors told her they couldn't fix her. She tried to kill herself right there on the dock in front of the ship. She came back again this year and Dr. Brian said he would try but he wasn't able to fix all the damage. She will live the remainder of her life leaking urine and living with all that means (skin breakdown, smelling horrible, an outcast). Please pray for her as we all have been doing. She has received much counseling from our chaplains and counselors but we just have to put her in God's hands and know he loves her more than we ever could.

In contrast to Fatamata, I've been caring for a spunky, older woman named Mary. Once I told her that was my mom's name, she has called me 'her daughter.' She was fixed by Dr. Brian and we had her dress ceremony today. For an hour, we sang worship songs to God, she gave her testimony, she hugged all of us and thanked us and I got to present her with her new Bible, a bar of soap and a mirror all representing new life. Every dress ceremony is unbelievably emotional.

During the ceremony, I sat on one of the beds and I just kept looking between Fatamata (who was watching the ceremony) and Mary - just back and forth. And I just couldn't grasp the 'why' of this whole situation. I was so happy for Mary and then would just feel so sad for Fatamata. This happens in every dress ceremony - we celebrate for those who are physically healed but there are always one or two who can't be healed at the same time. Just so you know, all women are invited to participate in the dress ceremony, not just the ones who are physically healed. I don't know if Fatamata will.

Anyways, I don't have any answers and I'm not going into all the theological reasons on why God allows bad things to happen. I know all those answers but on days like this, it isn't enough. So I just continue to pray and know that I will never be the same.

The Orphanage and Pizza!

Saturday I was able to venture off the ship again. Saturday morning, a group of 11 crew went to God's Childrens Home which is an orphanage run by a lady named Mama Vera. The orphanage has about 50 awesome kids! I don't have any pictures so I can only describe it. It is a Mercy Ships policy that we cannot take photos at any of the ministry places because we don't want them to feel like they are a tourist attraction.

I guess when I pictured an orphanage, I thought of ones I had read about in China where there are too many kids with too few caregivers and babies in cribs that never receive any attention or love. This place is the opposite of what I expected. While the facility certainly isn't a five-star hotel, it is clean and meets the needs of the kids.

Each bedroom has 15 bunks (three high) with mosquito nets over each bunk and windows to the outside. Then there is one large room where we played with the kids. There is also a place to eat, a school and a playing field but I didn't see that part. We sang, told Bible stories, played games and just hung out. One of our crew members is a clown and he made balloon animals which was a huge hit.

As soon as we walked in, we were each swarmed with tons of children hanging on to us. These kids are well-loved, well-fed and had smiles on their faces. I plan on going back every other Saturday (I have to work the other Saturdays) to really build some relationships with the kids.

After the orphanage, I went with a group to a restaurant called Mona Lisa to celebrate a birthday and my roommate Michelle's going away. It was a really nice restaurant - like something we would eat at in the States. This restaurant serves ice cream, pastries and real food! I actually got to eat pizza and it tasted exactly how I would expect pizza to taste. One of the problems with the food here on the ship is that you expect something to taste a certain way (like spaghetti) but when you bite into it, it has a completely different taste. I'm mostly living on peanut butter.

The taxi rides to and from the restaurant were very eventful (and tiring). They jam as many people as they can possibly get into one taxi and it is sooooo hot. Plus they have the radio blaring. And for some reason, taxi drivers won't pick up white people so we always have to have someone who is just hanging out on the street to get us a taxi and then we have to pay that person. Plus it takes two different taxis to get there.

On the way to the restaurant, my poor roommate Michelle got smashed into the middle of the front seat and the Liberian to her right tried to get her to go out with him the entire time. He just wouldn't take no for an answer. Then he was going to hang out in front of the restaurant to wait for her to finish her meal. I'm not sure what she said to get rid of him but he finally left.

As much as I enjoyed the pizza, the taxi rides almost make it not worth the effort. It will probably be awhile before I head out on an outing that requires a taxi.

My roommate Michelle (from Chicago) left Monday after being here for six months. She was ready to go home. We got another roommate named Joy from Ireland the same day Michelle left. It is now Thursday and I still haven't met her. It just shows how different our schedules are since nurses work shifts that cover 24 hours in a day. My room now has representatives of all of Great Britain (Scotland, Wales, England and Ireland) plus two of us Americans.

I have a few more photos of areas on the ship:

Here's the dining room. Meals are only between certain hours and you don't have much choice on what you eat. It's the same food every day and for every meal except the main dish varies each day. Breakfast is always only cereal or bread. I only make it to breakfast on weekends because they don't serve lunch on the weekends. We have to make our lunch at breakfast time. For me, that means peanut butter sandwiches.

Here's a view of my cabin from the front door. There are three cubbie holes, each with two bunks, a wardrobe, a fold-up desk and a four-shelf bookcase on the wall. The first two cubbies are maybe about 6' x 7'. I live in the penthouse (as my roommate calls it) in the back. It is maybe about 9'x9' and its desk doesn't fold-up because there is actually enough room to have it stay open. In the other two cubbies, if you unfold the desk, then there is zero walking space. You can also see our clothesline on the right where we hang wet clothes. There is also a small bathroom as you walk in the front door.

Here is the internet cafe. There are 21 computers here. We also have wireless abilities in our cabins and in the lounge areas.

Here's another view of the internet cafe. There is a lounge area next to it as well as on the other side (where I'm standing as I took the photo). There is also a lounge area directly below on deck 5.

Here's my roommate Megan at Starbucks cafe. It is the only official Starbucks in West Africa. Each ingredient in a drink is $.25 so my usual latte costs $.75. To the left of Starbucks is the Ship Shoppe. It's not very big but has toiletries, food and gifts.

We like to joke about how we are suffering for Jesus. In all seriousness, there are so many people in the world who are suffering because of their love for Jesus. However, while we might be doing mission work for God, you don't need to feel sorry for us - the extent of our suffering is our two-minute shower limitation and the lamb that they serve 2-3 days a week.

Oh, I gotta go - the fire alarm just went off (it's a drill) so we have to muster on the dock (and it's pouring down rain:(

Peace,

Michele

Random pictures

Thanks everyone for your emails and prayers for the crew. It has been a difficult week here on the ship. So, in light of that, I'm posting just some random, fun photos of friends I've met on the ship.
Megan (r) and Michelle - two of my 5 roommates. Megan is from Bucks County, PA (apparently the best place on the planet:) and Michelle is from the Chicago area. Megan is here for one year and Michelle leaves on Monday. Both are nurses.

This is Dorothy, another roommate and nurse. She is from Canada but originally from England. A cake to celebrate her birthday - notice the fake candles since we can't have any kind of fire on board. I have two other roommates (no photos yet) - Jo (nurse) is from Wales and Sarah (doctor) is from Australia (but originally from England).

Some of the nurses I work with: Helene from Germany, Sandra from New Zealand, Melanie, Crystal and Laura, all from the U.S.

This is Captain Jurryan (r) who is in charge of the ship and crew. He doesn't usually dress this formally except for special events and meeting dignitaries which happens quite frequently. The former president of Liberia was here on the ship two days ago for a tour. I never saw him but I wondered why there were so many UN peacekeepers on the dock with their guns.

Here is Megan with one of our VVF patients, Quata. Quata has been here for over one month as she has some open wounds that have not healed very quickly. Unfortunately, her surgery did not work and she has to return in October for another attempt. She's pretty quiet but had quite the laugh at me last evening while I was attempting to feed the 6 month old baby of one our patients. It didn't go so well.

This photo was taken by our Mercy Ships photographer. The middle girl is Mary who is 17 and spent about 3 weeks on the ward. She had extensive damage that we couldn't repair. She will also return in October and hopefully we can fix her. She lost her baby during childbirth and then ended up with so much damage that she constantly leaks urine and feces. I can't imagine facing that kind of life at only 17.

Here is Dr. Steve and six of the ladies he repaired. They are in the new dresses they received at the Dress Ceremony which symbolizes new life.

Patients waiting in line for eye screenings. We do about 20 or so eye surgeries per day.

Another screening in front of the ship.









That's all for now. I'm going to an orphanage tomorrow to play with the kids so I'll have photos of that this weekend.

Michele